Friday, January 11, 2013

Disney World Sans Children: Cocktails Galore, Hitchhiking Ghost Keith, and MONKEYS

Last month, Keith and I spent a week at Disney World with his parents, brothers, grandparents, aunt, uncle, cousins, and a family friend. It was incredible! We spent much of our time in the World Showcase (aka the Booze Park), telling stories, shopping, catching up, and doing ridiculous things with marionettes. My best memories include trying on tiaras with Keith's Aunt Jackie, learning about his Grandma Joyce's adventurous streak over beers at the Rose & Crown Pub, and talking music with his brother Ryan over lunch in not-really-Morocco. I was so present in the moment that it often didn't occur to me to take pictures, but at least I  brought home great memories. If you're planning a trip to the parks soon, maybe this advice will help:

Jen and Keith's Disneyworld Dos and Don'ts
Do: Bring moleskin. Your normal walking shoes won't cut it at Disney World.
Don't: Stay in the parks all day. Swim or watch a movie in the afternoon, then go back to the parks at night.
Do: Get up early to get Fast Passes for the best rides.
Don't: Ride Tower of Terror (Ok, that's just MY Don't)!!!
Do: Ride Star Tours more than once; the line is usually short and it's different each time.
Do: Spend as much time with family as possible.

Welcome home! Our room at Kidani Village
DO: Stay on Disney property. It saves so much time and allows you to spend more time in the parks.

Don't: Forget to take pictures of yourself!
I think this is the only good picture we took of us together during this trip.

I found a library! And I'm feeling unphotogenic, due to bad cart food.
DON'T: Eat overpriced food from carts, unless you want to feel like doodoo on a stick.
I had some nachos that made me MSG sick for the rest of the day. Instead, buy groceries.

DO: Stop and watch the performers! It's a pleasant
break from lines, rides, and wading through stroller traffic.

Serveur Amusant, the acrobat waiter. Ooh la la!
DON'T: Go to the Magic Kingdom during the day, unless you want to get stuck in a maddening stroller traffic jam.

DO: Get the Park Hopper option, so you can go to the Magic Kingdom at night,
after the strollers have gone to bed, and enjoy other parks during the day.

I picked up a hitchhiking ghost at the Haunted Mansion.
Do: Take the long way into the Haunted Mansion so you can play the musical mausoleum and be the ghost poet's muse.

Don't: Forget to look at all the pretty little details.

Do: Split up and get into the single rider line at Expedition Everest so you can ride it over and over and over again.

Expedition Everest
Monkey friends! Gibbons
Do: OMG LOOK AT THE MONKEYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kilimanjaro Safari at Disney's Animal Kingdom
Do: Have your camera ready at the Kilimanjaro Safari.

It's time for DINOSAUR!
Do: Love the kitsch! Embrace the kitsch! And ride DINOSAUR!
Lunch at the Yak & Yeti
DO: Buy one nice meal per day. I liked the Sci-Fi Dine-In Theater Restaurant in Hollywood Studios, the
Yak & Yeti in Animal Kingdom, and the Tangierine Cafe in the Morocco pavilion at the World Showcase.

Sci-Fi Dine In Theater Restaurant

Do: Enjoy the priceless PSAs at the Sci-Fi Dine In Restaurant: "So glad the Love Bug finally
caught up with you! But don't let his bite affect your conduct during the show." Umm... WHAT?

Affection Section - Keith pets goat. Goat tries to eat something in Keith's pocket.

Worry if you're the only adult gleefully chasing down goats and pigs at the petting zoo.
Cough! Keith. Cough!

I love the World Showcase! Breakfast in France, lunch in Britain, a happy hour sake in Japan, and dinner in Italy
Do: Afternoon cocktails. Umbrellas and LED ice cubes strongly recommended.

I'm hoping we'll be returning to Disney in a year or so, so...
What tips do you have for visiting the most magical place on earth?


  1. DAMN now I really really really really want to go to Disney World! I'm so jealous right now! Looks like y'all had a blast :)

    1. I know, right?
      I mean... Sorry! :D

      You and Landon should go! For real!

  2. I just saw a commercial for kid-free visits to Disney and I thought "How would that be fun??" Now I know. I love the petting zoo funny!

    1. Haha, I know. But it's great! We were like little kids. Little kids full of booze, that is. :D


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